#as far as I know I was still a mutual with

[hitlikehammers]

POV: when you overhear your boyfriend’s bandmates who ⛔️do not like you⛔️ talking to him—about YOU

“Be real though, Ed. Harrington? You can’t actually be serious, here.” Steve doesn’t like to eavesdrop, like, on principle. Which is to say he totally does it. He just doesn’t wholly approve of it, or think it’s a very good habit to have, while still doing it. “You got me,” Eddie sighs, longer and deeper than can be taken wholly seriously. “I’m running my longest successful con to date.”

rating: t ♥️ tags: post-s4, established relationship, corroded coffin, as in: the gang’s all here and being VERY JUDGEMENTAL of eddie’s taste in men, and maybe steve had to pick eddie up from practice today so he overhears it WHOLLY WITHOUT INTENDING TO OKAY?, no one ever REALLY want to hear what the people they love really think of them when said people don’t know who all’s actually listening, true love, declarations of feelings, it’s actually really fucking hard to stand up to your friends, happy ending♥️

for @steddielovemonth day ten: "We are all a little weird and life's a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love." —Dr. Seuss

also! Unnamed Freak is Doug for the purpose of this fic because the book can fuck itself I say so 🖤

“Be real though, Ed,” the voice that filters through, and holds Steve’s hand from pushing the car door shut loud enough to notice, is fairly reasonable, like trying to talk down a suggestion absurd enough to send someone to the ER—which means, of the subjects at hand? It’s gotta be Jeff.

“You can’t actually be serious, here.”

Steve doesn’t like to eavesdrop, like, on principle.

Which is to say he totally does it.

He just doesn’t wholly approve of it, or think it’s a very good habit to have, while still doing it.

“You got me,” Eddie deadpans, but it’s like, venom-laced. It stings just to hear and Steve’s struck with how much his life’s changed since Spring Break, and more still since…well.

Since Eddie.

Because Steve is well aware the man can cut glass with how sharp his tongue can get, they did go to high school together whether they ran in the same circles or not.

It’s just strikes Steve in the moment that not once since Vecna, has Eddie turns that tongue on him.

Now, other uses of his tongue—

“I’m running my longest successful con to date. Yep, totally pulled it over on all you bitches,” and where it could be playful, every single word is sharpened to stab, to pierce, to drag the wound out so it bleeds, like a shiv to remind someone where they fucked up, in perpetuity.

“Please applaud.”

And oh, even Steve flinches at that tone, and he’s not even the target. Hell, he’s still in the driveway—he doesn’t make a rule of crashing band practice, no matter whose parents’ garage they’re using; Eddie’s van is just regularly in the shop for one thing or another, so he’s gotta come get his man. But he doesn’t, like, push his way in. Sometimes doesn’t even get out of the driver’s seat. He knows Eddie would more than welcome him; has the handful of times he’s ventured to step in to apologize for interrupting but remind him they have to pick up the shitheads. But one: Eddie is alone in his welcome, and like, the polar opposite of the other three guys, who range from staring daggers at Steve to sneering so scrunched up to the nose that it’d give Carol Perkins at her snittiest a run for her money.

And Steve wouldn’t have made it this far if he didn’t know how to recognise where he’s not wanted, and learn how to make the calculated decision of whether to walk or push his way in. And much as he loves Eddie? Steve actually wants his friends to eventually come around from probably, like, muttering ancestral curses under their breaths at him or something.

Plus, from what Steve understands? Jam sessions are personal. Sacred. Eddie had blushes and stammered the first time he let Steve listen in on works in progress; and Steve had rewarded him for the gift of it liberally and with genuine gusto. It’s earned him repeat performances on the regular, but Steve gets it’s a private thing in general. And these guys don’t know him, don’t presently care to—don’t trust him.

He figures it’s like…masturbating in front of someone. The art thing, the depth of making music and stuff. Showing your soul a little bit, losing control for the betterment of the final product.

Now, he and Eddie definitely have masturbated together, it’s actually fantastic foreplay, or even just a deliciously sloppy go on its own. But that’s neither here nor there. And also totally fucking different.

Steve really doesn’t want Eddie masturbating in front of anyone other than him, ever again. Steve’s sure as shit not looking to on his end; definitely not with the other members of Corroded fucking Coffin.

The metaphor might have gotten away from him. But you get the picture.

“No, man,” and that’s, that’s Gareth’s voice, Steve’s almost sure. Sharper. Concerned but also caustic on the undertow. “It’s just,” he snorts, the disbelieving sort: “this can’t be real.”

Okay, yeah. Tone plus actual words add up.

“Yeah, just,” Doug laughs a little nervous, like of all of them, Eddie’s verbal attack had the most weight in tempering his response of the three of them; “blink twice if you’re being held against your will.”

They all chuckle, but it’s toned down the whole way around—even Steve can clock that. These guys are boisterous when left to their devices, Steve’s taken note of that. Mostly watching from the sidelines—almost exclusively when they don’t know he’s there to watch.

Again: does not condone eavesdropping.

Does not try at all to refrain from doing it.

“I mean, you don’t expect us to believe you’re actually fucking him,” and oh, yeah, okay: Steve was pretty sure he was the topic conversation here, and despite some of the setbacks of recent years, he’s not insecure when it comes to relationships especially.

He’s definitely the only one fucking Eddie. And Eddie’s the only one fucking him.

And while he doesn’t really hold it against these guys for being wary of him—he wasn’t really a perpetrator of their high school woes, but he definitely didn’t do anything to make them less…woeful—so he’s mostly bummed about it for Eddie’s sake, and on principle, but like, seriously.

Doubting Steve successfully scoring Eddie Munson? Like, Eddie’s a catch, Steve of ll people is well aware, but. Steve’s also been long past fishing the shallow end of the pond, y’know?

Give him some credit.

“Right,” Steve narrows back in on what’s happening in the garage that he’s definitely feeling less guilty bout, seeing as he’s definitely a subject of the debate unfolding, but Eddie sounds…angry. Pissed off in that way he gets when he’s fed the fuck up.

“I’m out,” Steve hears scraping of equipment, the guitar case flipped open; “can’t actually make it next week,” he adds like a footnote.

It’s clear within a second he’s the only one who takes it with that same…energy.

“But we have to practice before the open mic—” Jeff, ever the voice of reason, sounds baffled; on his way to ticked off but not quite there yet.

Eddie, however—as is his wont in this type of mood—could not give two shits where the people around him land on the anger-o-meter; he’s exceeded them, even if only in his own head, and they are all therefore irrelevant to his very responsible decision to put distance between himself and doing something stupid he can’t take back.

It’s not the nicest way to deal but, honestly? Steve’s mostly just proud of Eddie for sticking with a coping mechanism that, while not without consequences, generally works better than most.

“I’ll see you guys in two, then. Probably.” And the case clicks shut, definitive, and Steve’s proud of that too; that Eddie’s not digging a hole when the guys re trying to bait him, intentionally or not, over Steve.

Steve doesn’t need Eddie to complicate his band, his friendships, over what the two of them have. One, it’s not their fucking business. And two?

Steve doesn’t thing he’s being self-important in saying he and Eddie…are bigger, and more, than even the very beat high school band.

Not that Steve would ever ask Eddie to choose or some bullshit like that. And he really does believe Eddie’s going places, if that’s what he decides he wants. But…there’s that.

Then there is them.

Different, like, stratospheres.

“What the fuck came up that you can’t make it next week? When we’re staring down our first actual shot at Battle of the Bands this year,” and yeah, of course, if anyone’s gonna try to drag the whole thing out, it’s Gareth. Kid’s got a fucking temper.

“Something more important.”

Which yeah, that’s what was going through Steve’s mind, basically, but—

“The hell could be more—“

“I have plans,” Eddie hisses, viper-quick and fucking deadly, shuts them all right up for it, but then he spins a 180–preens so big Steve swears he can hear his shoulders go back and his chest puff out:

“It’s my anniversary.”

So…yeah. Just because it was where Steve’s head had just been at doesn’t mean his whole chest goes all gooey to hear it said out loud.

And in front of Eddie’s band, who…they aren’t hiding from, but they have discussed keeping kinda mum around. For the same kinds of reasons Steve’s been privy to just in the past couple minutes.

But then Eddie’s voice follows the feeling in Steve’s chest like they’re tethered there, and honestly, more times than not?

Steve thinks they just might actually be, and he’s not proven wrong with the way Eddie halfway coos:

“Our anniversary.”

“Your what?”

Jeff, again, is that middle ground: actually confused, laced with being angry that Eddie’s ducking out.

“Six months,” Eddie answers, soft-like, a little dreamy but in this way that’s rooted somehow still, and in being struck all over again by a level of shock Steve understands, sometimes feels in reverse, but still doesn’t understand being felt so deep as it sounds, now, when it’s applied to…him.

It’s wild y’know?

“I’m like,” Steve hears Eddie’s curls brush against something as he shakes his head—Steve’s money’s on him crouched by his case, or having it already slung over his shoulder:

“Never thought I’d get something to celebrate like that in the first place, but get to keep it, that long without fucking it up?”

Steve, again, wants to give up the pretense and walk the fuck in there and kiss the shit out of his boyfriend because one, same, but two?

Dumbass.

Steve goddamn adores him.

“You mean, with Harrington?” Gareth’s spitting and Steve just shakes his head, a little sad—he doesn’t know what’s crawled up that kid’s ass about him, man; he’s not so much younger that Steve never saw him or didn’t know of him but godDamn: the circles he ran in at the time weren’t the ones doing shit yet when they were in the same elementary school, Steve was barely popular in middle school, and come high school the worst anyone he knew did to the frosh was bang them into a locker—not great, but.

Not worth this shit. And the worst part is if he doesn’t know what’s crawled he did to really piss Gareth off this bad? He can’t even try to Harrington-charm his way back into the guy’s tolerable category. Like, even his best fucking not-pot brownie recipe didn’t sway the fucker.

“Yes,” Eddie is answering, the answer emphatic, like he’s brimming with feeling over it, but then clipped too, like demonstrating that he was brimming and is now being forced to clip it all backis very much the intent: “of course I mean with Steve, who the fuck else?”

It’s not lost on Steve how Eddie says his name. Ever. All the name.

But right now, how he’s making a point to say it in that warm, kinda…beloved way, when anyone else uses his last name in a way that’s anything-but.

“You cannot be—” Gareth scoffs, Steve can imagine him throwing up his hands, that sort of deal, but then Eddie comes in, and it’s a tone Steve’s only ever hear when he’s about to run a campaign into the ground where the characters may never recover, and if somehow manage it, they’ll wish they hadn’t:

“Oh, I am deadly serious.”

Because it’s not Steve’s character, but in defense of Steve’s relationship, that tone trickles something molten through his veins and prickles up his spine and…he’s gone have to stick that one in his back pocket to explore at a later date, for sure.

“Six months?”

Jeff—and Steve kinda likes Jeff, and not for the reason his bandmates would like, that he kicks around Hawkins after graduation, too, but more because Steve knows why; that’s to make more money for a college outside Indiana, and Steve thinks that’s fucking cool—but it’s here where Jeff dips fully away from being angry to being stupefied. Steve lets himself smirk at nothing because fuck yes: him and Eddie.

Six whole goddamn months.

“I was actually gonna ask you guys to come over soon, introduce him properly and stuff,” Eddie says, the disappointment in his voice again; Steve’s niggling desire to go and hug him from behind, maybe kiss under his ear a little, back in full force.

“He picks you up from practice, we see him,” Doug pipes back up, likewise confused, but Steve just takes the useful confirmation that no one did catch on that he pulled up ages ago, now.

“We know who Steve Harrington is—” Gareth snaps, protests in the way that betrays his eye-rolling, his thin-wearing patience.

“No!”

And that comes out of Eddie fierce enough to echo down at least half the block they’re on—seems like Eddie’s patience was worn out a while ago.

“You don’t!”

And everyone is silent in that way Steve knows all too well: when shit’a gone down but now you’re waiting in the edge for the worse thing to hit.

Then it does:

“And it’s a good thing I didn’t bring it up because you dipshits aren’t ready,” Eddie snaps, says dipshitso different from how he does with the Party, theirParty, their kids; he says it here with something real fucking close to disgust.

“Asking hostage questions, fuck off,” he huffs, and Steve hears Eddie’s footsteps, can’t tell if he’s gonna leave it at that, come find Steve and know he’s been standing there but that’ll be fine, it’s not like Steve wasn’t going to let him know as soon as they left—but then:

“Look,” and Eddie sounds the way Steve sounds when he’s pinching the bridge of his nose to fight a growing migraine, the sting of tears for all sorts of pain behind his eyes, and that hurts to hear from his boyfriend, like, a lot.

It fucking hurts.

“I am not just fucking him,” Eddie growls through the bridge-pinching pain; “I mean, fuck yes, I am, but,” and Steve hears the way he swallows all the way down the drive:

“I’m in this for the long haul,” Eddie tells his bandmates like throwing down a gauntlet; “and if you can’t respect me enough, and my choices, that stings,” Steve knows Eddie shrugs then: “but I’ll live.”

Steve’s about a millisecond from saying fuck it, opening the door just to slam it to announce his approach, and then going to physically grab his boyfriend, drag him to the car, and park in the abandoned lot down from the Wheelers’ neighborhood to kiss him senseless because that’s the closest place he can think of and he doesn’t think he’ll make it to either of their homes before he can’t fucking handle himself.

“But if you are gonna disrespect the man I love, no. Absolutely not.”

Eddies voice is a deadly sort of whisper. Steve would cower at it, the way it washes through a person, if he hadn’t just…said.

That.

“You love him?”

And for what Steve thinks is the first time since he climbed out of the car and committed to listening where he wasn’t invited, Gareth sounds…muted. Genuinely asking a question.

Steve, for his own part, kinda expected that he’d be more breathless, heart racing and shit, to hear the answer but in reality?

“Of course I love him.”

Steve already knew that in his cells, in his bones.

In his steady, not all-that-fast but particularly-especially-happily beating heart.

“Have you guys, like, said it and stuff?”

And of course Steve already knows that answer, both the literal one and the one that matters more, but he does perk up a bit, curious to hear what—if anything of note—Eddie chooses to give away here.

“He has,” Eddie says, and now…now maybe Steve should stop listening because this part, the way Eddie says that as flat fact—Steve doesn’t knowthis part beyond speculation. But…

“I wanted to, like,” and eddies voice can’t hide the way he’s gotta have that soft smile, the one he used to hide behind his hair before Steve started pulling it back to see in full, so now he only brings his hair out just to tease, to okay.

“I don’t think I’ve wanted much in my whole life, but he’s,” and Steve thinks he hears how Eddie chews his bottom lip for a second, in the subtlest click of how it slips free before Eddie takes a deep breath and—

“He doesn’t know what he’s worth,” Eddie starts, a little mournful almost, even, and Steve is unexpectedly glued to the spot in his fucking Nikes.

“He doesn’t understand that I’d sell the sun and the moon just to keep him,” Eddie’s saying, and with passion. With whole-ass honesty. And here, maybe, is where Steve gets to have some of the heart:fluttery feeling after all:

“He comes out the gate with the whole you don’t have to say it back and I just,” Eddie sighs, sniffs a little before heaving another breath deep enough to stretch his shirt, which Steve’s not imagining or anything, at all;

“I couldn’t say it, not right then, and risk him everthinking it was something I’d done to like, match. Like that I didn’t mean it with everything I’ve got, when I mean it with everything I’ve got and then also everything else. Like, anywhere. Ever.”

Steve realized he’d stopped breathing at some point when the little dots start floating in front of his eyes and he sucks in a shaking breath because: he’s known Eddie loves him. Unshakeably.

But, but all this—

“I couldn’t say it and have him ever wondered if I wouldn’t rip my heart out of my chest just to keep his safe.”

And of-fucking-course Steve’s pulse is running fucking riot about how much he’s in love right now, make no goddamn mistake. Jesus, he—

“Fuck.”

And Steve has never heard Gareth Emerson pushed just this side of speechless but: that’s the best way Steve can describe the kind of breathless wonder he says it with, like watching a rare bird take flight.

“You mean it.”

And Steve can pick out Eddie’s huffs and categorize them, on demand at this point: he doesn’t need to see the eye-roll to know Eddie’s deemed the expression of pure shock to be so beneath him in this specific context that he’s deemed it unworthy of any more attention.

His heart’s not jumping that loud to have missed it. So.

Steve just kinda grins toward the blacktop under his shoes.

“Why didn’t you,” Doug starts, still—usually, really, in Steve’s limited experience at least—the peacekeeper, the one who’s most invested at the human level when he’s not getting swept up in whatever the rest of the gang has deemed the cool thing to laugh at or make fun of at any given moment.

The huff Eddie gives this time is his incredulous one, which allows for just the slightest bit more consideration:

“The fuck do you think?”

The slightest bit, being the operative point.

“I’d hoped you’d take it better but,” Eddie adds, and there’s less drama in it than Steve might have expected. He’s being serious with them, and he sounds…disappointed.

Steve kinda want to make some kind of noise, give away his position, and just…hug Eddie tight from behind, if nothing else. Be there. Solid against him, wrapped up around him. Never wavering. Always at his back as much as at his side.

But Eddie’s not done:

“I’m not even asking you to like him, just be decent,” and it sounds like it hurts him to say as much, and Steve knows why; he genuinely despises when anyone thinks Lea with a the very beat thing about Steve. Steve believes this to be n unreasonable standard, and has expressed as much to Eddie who nods and smiles and kisses Steve’s forehead and does absolutely nothing to change his stance, but deep down?

Steve fucking feels so…loved for it.

“And like I said,” Steve can hear the judgement in Eddie’s tone clear as day; “you’re not ready, and I’m not putting him in that kind of situation.”

Steve sucks on the inside of his cheek, lest his grin at the way Eddie is not just defending him, but…protecting him, not his honor but his heart…

No ones ever even tried that before. Steve may not need it, or maybe he just learned he couldn’t survive needing it.

Getting it now…now it’s just…

Wow.

“And I’m in this for keeps, like, this is a forever type thing, so long as he wants it,” Eddie saying, explaining the color of a sky to a small child like what these words are that fundamental, that unalterably true. “So—”

“We’ve known each other forever, man,” Gareth eventually mutters, sounds indignant, but mostly gutted.

Steve knows before it happens that it’s not gonna make a difference.

“And we can still know each other. Just not everything, anymore,” and Eddie does sound a little sad but he’s…he’s a monolith, unshakable. “I don’t trust you with the parts that revolve around him, yet,” and Steve feels more than hears the ways his friends deflate, maybe shrink for being deemed so…insufficient. In the eyes of their ostensible leader, no less.

“Eddie, we didn’t,” Jeff starts, slow, and he doesn’t sound remorseful but—Eddie has all those coping mechanisms for a reason, right?

Because he’s quick to feeling, good and bad, and sometimes neither is fit to the moment.

Steve can’t help but be kinda glad Eddie doesn’t bother with those mechanisms just now, though, if it means he gets to hear this part:

“I know you didn’t, that’s the fucking problem,” Eddie groans, Steve can see the way he lens, bends at the knees and throws his body around a little in sheer, undiluted exasperation. “

“Because I could tell you he’s changed since school, and that’d be true, but that’s not even it,” and there’s more of the frustrated stomping round, Steve can hear it, but he’s…he’s ready distracted by that thing in his chest that has to has to be tied up in Eddie’s, too, that thing tugging on him to pay the fuck attention.

And who is he to ignore it?

“he was never who we thought he was in school in the first place. He is,” Eddie licks his lips, just to snack them loud:

“He is kind and funny, and goofy, and such a fuckin’ nerd, and he’s smart in these incredible ways where he’s sees what everyone else misses, and he’s protective as fuck and he’s got a heart of gold,” and Eddie’s voice only gets more heartfelt in its own right that longer he goes and Steve just, he’s, it’s—

“And I would tear my skin off just so it doesn’t get so much as a scuff on it,” Eddie ends with the most scathing delivery imaginable: he fucking meansthis shit. And Steve is going o live and die next to this man, scuffed heart still kept safe to the fucking end, he will swear that shit to anyone who needs to hear it.

He is going to have a whole fucking life with Eddie Munson, and love him for every single breath of it.

“And I don’t trust you guys yet not to tempt me to tear off my skin,” Eddie says finally after enough silence to catch his breath, and temper his tone just enough to sound tired; a little dejected. “I don’t trust you with him, and until that changes, we’re still friends,” Eddie sniffs, breathes out long; “you just won’t get to know about that part of me.”

He says it so simple, like he’s not half-cutting off some of the longest, closest friendships he’s ever had, and for Steve.

Steve doesn’t know if it makes him a person, or a really selfish one or whatever, if he doesn’t feel any urge to talk Eddie down, to make him walk it back just a little.

He doesn’t think he cares, though, either way.

“Seems like a really big part of you,” Doug says, deflated entirely.

“It is,” Eddie answers, unapologetic in a way that swells and sparkles in Steve’s ribs. “He is.”

“You’d walk from the band?” Of course Gareth asks, but it’s the first time he sounds small in his words. Like he maybe knows the answer, and isn’t so okay with how he got around to it even before Eddie wishes all doubt:

“In half a fuckin’ heartbeat.” Boom. Done. No hesitation whatsoever.

Less than half-a-fuckin’-heartbeat.

“That’s not what I’m saying I’m doing right now, but,” Eddie laughs a little, and that probably cuts deeper than anything for the boys, Steve suspects, especially when Eddie makes it unquestionable:

“It’s not even a question.”

And…maybe that drives a knife deeper for the band, but for Steve?

Steve kinda wants to…giggle, or some shit. He hadn’t realized just how much he wanted someone who answered a question like that, exactly like that, who talked about Steve exactly like that, without anything to gain, just because they…believed it.

“Jesus,” Gareth mutters, sounds kinda blindsided, kinda thrown and then some.

“If we,” Jeff clears his throat after a long period of quiet; “if we do better, could we meet him someday?” And the way he says it, earnest and shit:, like he wants to at least think about, at least maybe try:

“Like, really meet him?”

Like Eddie means enough that he’ll try, and that sings sweet in Steve’s veins because goddamn straight, his Eddie deserves that from the people hecares about. No matter who or what Steve is, Eddiedeserves that much, and so much more.

But he sounds like even just this is something amazing, Steve can hear the smile in his voice:

“Yeah, man,” he answers Jeff, claps him audibly on the shoulder; “I look forward to it.”

And shit, y’know what?

So does Steve.

“See you in two weeks,” and Eddies footsteps follow, guitar slung over his back for the way his weight falls with each one, but then:

“Eddie!”

That’s Doug; the footsteps stop close to the edge of the garage door as another set rushes to catch up, where he’ll see Steve if he walks much farther, where Steve’s got his hand on the door handle of the car, slowly inching it open to push shut and look wholly-unsuspicious now that Eddie might be followed out to his ride:

“Get him flowers. For your anniversary,” Doug says, tone low like a secret; “I know, like, it might seem like guys wouldn’t want flowers, but,” and Steve actually has to strain to hear the next part:

“My mom gets my dad flowers on his birthday every year, and he lights up like the Fourth of July.”

Steve remembers the first time he ever got flowers. His favorites, even if he thinks he only knew it subconsciously because they were handed to him with the stammering explanation of I don’t even know if you like flowers, or like these ones, but you look at them when we’re out, like, just walking or something and your eyes linger, and these ones just remind me of you and—

Apparently, Steve loves hyacinths. And sunflowers make Eddie think of him.

Because of course Steve’s first gift of flowers came from Eddie.

“Thanks man,” Eddie sounds the lightest, most genuine Steve’s heard him since he pulled up and got out of the car; “they’re already ordered.”

And Doug chuckles, and Steve?

Steve bites down his smile to less exploding-star levels—if he’d just pulled up he doesn’t have a reason, save that Eddie is enough of a reason in Steve’s eyes, his mind, the way his chest expands just thinking on him—as he pulls the car door closed again, loud enough to be noticed.

For Eddie to walk out of the garage fast as anything and meet Steve with a smile of his own that justifies the fuck out of where Steve’s had started, anyway.

All star-bright and everything.

♥️🎸♥️

✨also on ao3✨

btw this is either titled ‘halcyon shoegazing’ or ‘heart in your shoes’ so if you have an opinion you should maybe tell me or something, my brain’s tired and is resisting decisions rn

✨permanent tag list: OPEN (lmk if you want to be added/removed): @ajeff855 @askitwithflours @awkwardgravity1 @bookworm0690 @bumblebeecuttlefishes @captain--low @depressed-freak13 @dragoon-ze-great @dreamercec @dreamwatch @dreamy-jeans137 @estrellami-1 @goodolefashionedloverboi @grtwdsmwhr @gunsknivesandplaid @hiei-harringtonmunson @hbyrde36 @imhereforthelolzdontyellatme @kimsnooks @live-laugh-love-dietrich @mensch-anthropos-human @nerdyglassescheeseychick @notaqueenakhaleesi @ollyxar @pearynice @perseus-notjackson @pretend-theres-a-name-here

divider credit here and here and here

[whyohwhydoris]

In university, I took a course on international foreign and military policy. This course used US policy decisions from 1900 onwards to analyse the struggles on international politics, particularly from a military stand point. As we were learning different models of analysis and decision making, and while we were looking for traps like group-think, etc, we got to the Cuban Missile Crisis. My professor - a brilliant woman with a background in Marxist economic theory - set us a game.

Anyway, our class of ~35 were divided into 8 teams and the teams were paired off. We were presented with a modified prisoners dilemma: across multiple rounds, we had to choose whether or not to nuke our opponents. If neither team pulled the trigger, both earned 5 points; if both did, both earned 3 points; if one did, they earned 10 points and the other earned 0.

At the end, the winning team with the most points would win extra credit - enough to shift a letter grade on an assignment.

I convinced my team to nuke round 1. We were the only team that did. We nuke each other the next three rounds. But, after, teams are nuking each other a lot. Most games devolve into a perpetual nuclear exchange. Eventually, I quietly asked "can we let the other team make our decision for us?" - the professor replied that the only limits were in our instructions. For the next 12-15 turns, our teams developed and used a mutual verification. But, my team had the lead from the first round. Because we had developed a peace mechanism early though, we had racked up the most points between us. Third to last round, the other team, knowing they can only win with a unilateral strike, refuse our mechanism. I tell them, clearly, we will launch if they back out. My team is letting me lead because we're far and away the winners. They still withdraw, and for the last few turns, we nuke each other.

At the end, the instructor goes around, and she says she has never seen teams nuke each other so much. That we're the most cynical class she has ever had. Everyone talks through their strategy and reasoning. Through their whys. And, at the end, she amused but slightly disquiet. And the one of my peers pipes up:

"We're the 9/11 generation. We've grown up during the global war on terror. We've seen military and foreign policy cock ups for our entire lives."

The class start talking about it, about how that impacted us and our world view. We don't play games. We don't assume. Because we've seen the arrogance of the US government get too many people killed all to make a problem worse. We won't assume that our adversary is less able than us. We won't assume they are less cunning. Or that we aren't the villains of their story.

She said that we might be the first class she had ever had to uniformly deny American exceptionalism. That, despite that, we might be the most patriotic class she'd ever had. Because each and every one of us had talked about democracy, equality, liberty. As we condemned US foreign policy in our lifetimes, we talked about the other sides of our conflicts as equals, and with sorrow. About emerging adversaries as problems we must be unbe ding with, but as people who need compassion non-the-less.

I don't know why this reminded me of that - of that moment of cynical black-hearted hope in that class room as we looked around and realized we had to fix these things. Bitterness and hope together. A coldness and a compassion paired. A willingness and desire for cooperation, but an unwavering moral sensibility.

introducing my four year old niece to the concept of "moral dilemmas" by telling her that i'm a monster that eats children and that i know it's wrong but i'm so so so hungry and everything else tastes yucky. i've tried all the human food in the world and it all tastes so yucky i can't even eat it. i can only eat children and i'm so hungry

[girl-lostconnection]

Hello!!!

I’ve been reading your works for a while and I’m hyperfixating adore you’re writings! So I saw this Red Bull ad during the Super Bowl and the penguin reminded me of Soap. Could I please humbly request hybridpenguin!Soap x reader fluff/comfort/romance/head canons anything really. I think you can bring this idea to life :3

It’s your lucky day cause I’ve been watching “Good luck Chuck” and there are some penguins that caught my eye. So I’ve been thinking about it whole day, googling penguins because I honestly don’t know much about them.

I chose Adelie Penguin for Soap because the blue-eyed stare this birds have is perfectly uncanny (I urge you to google them, they stare right in your soul) and also, they have very interesting courting rituals.

Also the wiki page for them said, I quote: “Despite their size, Adélie penguins are known for their bold and boisterous personality and will challenge other animals, including predators far larger than them.” And that reads like canonical Soap, because yeah, he would. Bold personality is right up this man’s alley.

But imagine hybrid Adelie Penguin!Soap and human Reader where he tries so fucking hard to court you properly but you don’t know jackshit about courting methods.

Male Adelie Penguins offer female penguin the perfect stone, polished to perfection, they spend quite some time looking for the best one and once found — they present it as a courting gift. It depends purely on the female penguin whether to accept courtship or not.

But if she does they can start mutual courting involving leaning closer to each other, grooming each other, familiarising with how each other sound — it helps them later to find the mate in the big crowd.

So Soap knows that maybe it would have been better to go with flower or something more conventional but he likes you, god, he really does. So there’s no harm in looking for a pretty stone for a pretty you, right?

Right?

Man spends his whole leave on Scotland’s shores, practically on all fours as he picks up decent stones, washes and polishes them at home before throw them all out because no. All wrong. Not prettty enough, not smooth enough, not shiny enough.

No mate would accept a shite like that, why would he even bring this ugly thing to your attention? What kind of potential mate would he be?

He returns to his searches even more determined. Soap will be damned if he comes back and he still doesn’t have a perfect stone for you.

And finally, luck smiles at him and dedication pays off — the perfect prettiest little stone he has ever seen. Smooth from cold waves, shiny in a way that makes you want it touch again and again, perfectly round. No ridges or bumps, no sharp edges or cracks.

Perfect stone for perfect you.

He returns feeling victorious and on top of the world and presents you with a stone without a second word. Quite literally he just extends his hand and there lies the stone. He doesn’t say anything, he’s just waiting for your reaction

And you have no fucking idea what’s going on, because the man is staring you in the eyes with his ungodly blue eyes and a little stone on his palm and you’re like…okay?:,) alright?🥹

So you take the stone to look closer (Soap tenses up like you have his heart in your hands, eyes hungry on you, still waiting for your reaction) and truth be told, it is a really nice stone. Shiny and smooth and perfectly polished. The kind of stone you’d want to fumble with all day, just rolling through the palm, massaging the center of your palm with it as you work.

It is a bloody lovely stone. You really like it.

But Johnny is not saying it, still watching you with the same hungry look, it’s just that now his grin is widening slowly because you look like you really like the stone. He did a good job, right? There’s no way you found his courting gift lacking.

And it is a perfect stone but the thing is…you don’t know if it’s a gift to you or if penguin part of Soap is simply showing off (crow!Simon does similar things when he brings you shiny stuff). So you don’t know if you are at liberty to keep the shiny pebble.

And Johnny is still completely fucking silent watching you with bated breath.

You carefully place the stone back in his palm, murmuring softly that it’s a very lovely stone, it looks incredible and you think it is absolutely gorgeous.

Soap stares at the stone for a few very long moments, his grin slowly fading because…don’t- don’t you like the stone, hen? You just said it’s gorgeous, but you are giving it back. Why are you giving it back?

He stares at the stone, absolutely crest-fallen in the face because he was so sure you’d like it. He was so proud of it and so excited to give it to you and of course there is no pressure for you to take it, after all it’s gift for you and you shouldn’t just settle for things.

But still.

What was wrong with it? Was there a crack he didn’t notice or is the texture of it not to your liking? Maybe you prefer sharper stones, maybe you like some roughness to them?

He looks back at you, feeling upset and anxious, stone still in hand while you try to gauge what the hell caused the reaction. Because Johnny is looking at you like you just kicked him in the stomach and you don’t know why.

“Ye didnae like it, hen?”, he swallows his pride and asks because obviously, you didn’t, what kind of fucking question is that. Mate just returned his gift back to him, means that gift is not up to standards.

You blink at him slowly, because what is he even talking about.

“I liked it. It’s really pretty. Where did you get it?”, you try to steer conversation away, since maybe there’s something you don’t seem to get about the stone.

“Why- ye didnae take it”, Soap’s voice is unusually soft, as he tilts his head to the side, stone clutched in his hand as some anxiety bleeds out of him.

Maybe he can still salvage it.

“Was it for me?”, the question leaves him now being the one who gives you a slow blink, before his gears kick in, realisations slowly creeping up his head. So that’s what was wrong.

“Aye”, stone returns to your palm, gets pressed into it by Johnny’s — warm and smooth — your heart skipping a beat. “If ye like it, Ah’d be happy if ye took it. But ainlie if ye like it, hen”

There’s a weight to this moment that you aren’t sure you capture fully but there’s something in Soap’s eyes that makes your fingers intertwine with his, head leaning closer to him. You are so close you can see the tiniest freckles on his cheeks.

Pretty.

“I really like it”, admitting it feels like you are ten again and sharing a silly secret with a boy you like, but Johnny looks at you like he couldn’t be happier.

His throat bobbing when you lean in closer, small shiver going down his spine because it’s really happening. His gift is accepted, his mate is accepting him — holding his hand, leaning into him, looking at him like that.

Best day of his life, truly.

So he presses a short tight kiss to your temple and nods at you like there is a shared understanding between you two now. Like you are partners in crime.

Soap practically jogs away, excitement evident in every step, shoulders spread out proudly. He fucking did it. He got the perfect stone for perfect you and you accepted it.

Now, the courting can really begin.

(It will take you an evening of google searches before you understand the meaning of the stone and why the hell, Soap is helping with your hair routine/skin care routine/nail polishing and even offers to “wash with the penguin, save the water, hen”)

[blueblossomrose]

TW boys with a fem reader who is basically Rapunzel from Tangled. Like, reader has magical long hair that can heal and it's also unbreakable. Plus, she has a kind and passionate personality but don't take her for granted, she can be fiesty when she wants and can stand on her own.

Characters: Ace Trappola, Azul Ashengrotto, Epel Felmier, Rollo Flamme, Ruggie Bucchi, Jamil Viper, Fellow Honest

Content: Rapunzel!Fem!MC/Reader, maybe broken english, references Tangled (2010), some swear words? maybe

Note(s): Thank you for the ask and sorry for the extreme delay 😭 I chose the characters that I thought best matched the request <3

Comments and reblogs are very welcome ♡

Summary: What if the prefect of the Ramshackle Dorm was a certain princess? One who has never left her tower, who has very long, magical hair, a pet chameleon, and uses a frying pan to defend herself.

He would probably make fun of you. I mean, besides being a newbie to Twisted Wonderland you're still so naive?

He might try to trick you with some harmless little lies, just to be funny, but as time goes by, he becomes more and more enchanted by you.

He might ask her to heal him of minor injuries just to see how it works, but he would pretend he didn't care much.

He would find it hilarious that you uses a frying pan to defend yourself. At first, he might tease you that it's a weird way to fight, but after he gets hit (probably because he's too cheeky), he realizes that you actually knows how to use it and learns to respect that.

Your magical hair, the way you handled things... even the frying pan hits you gave him over the head when he was going too far. He realizes that he enjoys your company more than a friend.

Because you're different from the people he knows. You are guileless, you doesn't lie like he does, and your honesty comes from a place of genuine kindness. This slowly disarms him.

He'd be irritated (but secretly confused) to realize that he likes to protect you when someone tries to take advantage of your naivety.

He might end up getting jealous if someone else gets too much attention from you. He would cover it up by saying he's just "keeping you out of trouble," but anyone would see that he's clearly bothered.

He doesn't get along with Pascal at first, his rivalry is even more intense with the little reptile than with Grim, actually.

Eventually, he becomes attached to Pascal as he has become attached to everyone in the group. The chameleon takes advantage of the opportunity to sit on his shoulders or on his orange hair.

When he's getting into trouble, you grab him with your hair and keep him from making more trouble, often turning him upside down.

When your hair was braided for better mobility, he was: 😳

It's in book 4 after the confusion with Jamil and Scarabia, he was semi-ready to declare himself more honestly.

"Look, I don't know if it's because you hit me over the head with that frying pan or if you really did charm me with that shiny hair, but... I think I like you. And before you say something silly... you better tell me you like me too."

Your very limited contact with men meant that you didn't have as many prejudices regarding height or... appearance.

This kind of made you not assume he was a girl and just ask him directly. This was enough to make Epel feel more comfortable with you.

Unlike Ace, his first contact with Pascal was surprisingly calm and he likes the little chameleon, the feeling is mutual.

Over time, Epel realized that he admired your strength and innocence. You are a bit naive but you knows how to defend yourself! He wanted to know how to handle that frying pan as well as you.

You encourage him beyond his insecurities, able to make him see the best in himself and show it to the world.

It's in book 6 that he realizes your true determination. I mean, the way you took out those robots was incredible!

He watched your magical hair heal everyone... truly so wonderful it's almost unbelievable. You have the gift of healing.

It was probably Vil who made your hair easier to move with a braid. Epel who put on the decorations, though. He blushed at your compliments.

He was ready to admit it when he's tied up in your hair.

"You... look even more beautiful from this angle..."

Upon hearing about the mysterious newcomer, Azul sees an opportunity. If you is lost and confused, perhaps you needs help... and who better than him to offer your a "small" contract?

He unfortunately (perhaps fortunately) was unable to actually contact you until the events from book 3.

Upon meeting you, Azul is intrigued. You unusual beauty, the sparkle in your eyes and, most importantly, your long magical hair pique his interest.

Your genuine kindness began to disconcert him. How could someone be so honest, so without ulterior motives? It was an irritating naivety… and at the same time, endearing.

Yet, you know how to defend yourself very well... much better than well, in fact.

When Floyd made a joke that your hair sometimes looked like Azul's tentacles, he found himself thinking about it more than he should have.

During book 4 you two get closer, you're practically his knight in shining armor. Although due to the situation, it should be the other way around.

Pascal didn't like him, but he started to like him after he helped you. Azul is happy that he no longer feels threatened by a animal that size.

He feels safe when he's being healed by you and your magical hair... maybe that means something.

You seem curious about your octopus form. It makes him feel embarrassed, but... you look so trusting. It's weird. He doesn't want to trust anyone but you just make his brain relax. It's scary.

To the point where he suddenly finds himself opening up to you about things he didn't want to talk initially, he suddenly stops with a red face and that stupid smile on your face only makes him redder.

"You look more confident with that braid, [Name]-san. Beautiful flowers."

Your long magical hair drew attention wherever you went, especially because it was uncut and shiny. Some students were curious, others suspicious, but none reacted like Rollo Flamme.

From the first moment he saw you, Rollo felt a mixture of fascination and contempt. Your hair clearly possessed magical properties, and the mere fact of its existence was a reminder of what he hated most.

However, you behavior baffled him. Unlike the arrogant mages he despised, you was kind and naive, in awe of everything around you. You asked questions about Noble Bell College, about Fleur City, about the Bell of Salvation, listening to each answer with an enchanted glint in your eyes.

He inevitably treated you differently than he treated the other students at NRC. At first it was to help his charade and also because you were a girl, but later it became much more genuine than he wanted.

Rollo tried to keep his distance, but he couldn’t help but feel a peculiar irritation whenever she got into trouble or when anyone got too close to her.

You used a frying pan to defend yourself, which was, in his view, completely absurd. And yet strangely effective. He witnessed this when a student tried to cut a lock of your hair and received a direct hit.

Your chameleon, who seemed to constantly judge him, became more of a problem. Pascal didn't like it when he got too close to you, and stuck his tongue in Rollo's ear. Mortifying. For Rollo at least.

The chaos of Rollo’s plan was coming to an end. Rollo knew he was defeated. But he refused to show weakness, even in the face of the fae prince. His body was exhausted, wounded, but before Malleus could deliver the final blow, [Name] acted, your long magical hair shot forward, coiling around Rollo and lifting him into the air, upside down.

His eyes widened, confused, indignant. “What do you think you’re doing?!” he would ask.

“Stopping Malleus from turning you to ash,” you replied, as if it were obvious. “You already lost. You doesn’t need to hurt yourself anymore.”

Rollo gritted his teeth, hating this feeling of helplessness. He tried to struggle, but the your strands were stronger than they looked. “I don’t need your pity,” he growled.

Before he could protest more, you began to sing. The golden glow enveloped his body, and Rollo felt something strange, a soft warmth running through his wounds, the pain dissipating, the fatigue fading.

He hated it. Hated the magic, hated the feeling of vulnerability. But most of all, he hated the fact that, for a brief moment, he didn’t want you to stop.

He hated all magic... but yours was an exception.

He helped re-braid your hair at the ball.

"Come here. I'll pick some flowers..."

Jamil imprisons you as part of his plan in the event of Book 4. You, who has never seen the world beyond your tower before Twisted Wonderland, not exactly panicking? But you understand that the situation is critical so you try to escape.

While trying to maintain his cover as a loyal servant, he mentally mocks your naivety at first, but is soon surprised by you determination in trying to escape... using a frying pan.

After book 4, he learned valuable lessons about how not to mess with you or your pets... and also that frying pans hurt a lot.

When forced to be around you, he begins to feel sympathy for you. He recognizes your kindness and passion, unlike Kalim, your ignorance was more justified in Jamil's opinion alone, of course.

Pascal didn't like him very much from the beginning, but when they understood each other, it became a beautiful friendship. I guess reptiles understand each other?

He would watch with unparalleled calm as you grabbed him with your hair... well, expected.

In book 5, he pulled you to the mat before Vil could even get close.

After several interactions in which he begins to realize your strength and kindness, Jamil falls in love with you. He sees in you someone who, despite your naivety, has the power to heal not only physically but emotionally. Everyone likes you, one way or another.

Just like Ace, he was 😳 when you showed off your Vil-braided hair. You look beautiful either way, but your hair has an extra charm this way.

"Nice braids... I can make some more for you. H-hm, if you want, of course."

Perfect Flynn Rider. Scoundrel, thief, humble origins... the name is Ruggie Bucchi.

He tried to take advantage of her naivety several times while they were getting to know each other, but after book 2, the relationship actually improved.

Whenever he tried to steal something from you without you seeing, Pascal would magically appear next to him and stick his tongue in Ruggie's ear.

"AARGH! Not again!" Ruggie shook like crazy, trying to get the little animal away. Pascal, in turn, just went back to his place, satisfied.

During the chaos at the book 3, Before Ruggie could react, he was lifted into the air, since [Name], in the heat of the moment, had used her long magical hair to hold him back. But, lost in the conversation, she simply forgot he was there. Ruggie was shaking his head, huffing. "Hey, uh… princess? I'm still here…" you continued talking to Azul, completely distracted. Then, without realizing it, you let your hair down.

Azul arched an eyebrow as Jade and Floyd watched with amusement. You covered your mouth, looking at Ruggie lying on the ground. "Oops..."

Ruggie groaned, not having the strength to curse.

Ruggie would sit with you at Savanaclaw, after seeing you upset with yourself for losing your dorm and being naive, and there he talks a little about his poor background, making you laugh a little with his statements and good mood, only to make you laugh again at the end when he tells you not to tell anyone, after all, "that would ruin his reputation."

Ruggie was no stranger to injuries. He was always getting into sticky situations, and when you saw some scrapes and bruises after a confrontation, your first instinct was: “Stay still.” Before he could question it, your hair wrapped around the wounds.

After everything they had been through in Book 3, Ruggie was tasked with taking you back to your dorm. Normally, he would have balked at doing something that didn’t directly benefit him, but for some reason, he accepted without hesitation. On the way, you talked about everything you had learned and how you felt. Ruggie listened, more attentively than he would like to admit. When you arrived, you smiled at him. His heart gave a strange leap.

"...Tsk. I hope you know I don't do anything for free, princess."

Perfect Flynn Rider #2. More than Ruggie, even.

The first time they met, he had ignored her. He was more focused on convincing the 'elite' of Night Raven College to accept his invitation and come to Playful Land.

When [Name] arrived at Playful Land, he finally noticed her. Her long, shiny hair adorned with flowers, her delicate face, and curious eyes. A naive, impressionable girl dazzled by the new world around her? The easiest prey he'd had in years... until she wasn't.

Pascal, her pet chameleon, hated Fellow Honest at first sight and immediately tried to attack him, slapping his face with its curled tail.

When the deception was revealed, Fellow's plan, she wasted no time. One clean strike with the frying pan. With the skill of her magical hair, she quickly tied Fellow and Gidel up, leaving them no chance of escape.

When Fellow woke up, he found himself trapped in [Name]'s hair, who was staring down at him with a steady gaze. “Very well, Fellow Honest…” she said slowly, her eyes narrowed. “I need to find my friends, and so I’ve decided to trust… you.” Fellow blinked in disbelief. “A horrible decision, really” he replied.

Fellow even tries to escape a few times, but every time he tries, she tightens her grip on her hair. Gidel remains silent and worries about Fellow, but he can't deny that it's a little funny to see him trying to escape before being dragged back to [Name].

During the scuffle to save the boys, Fellow had gotten himself badly hurt. He just agreed to guide [Name] to where they were and didn't want to get involved, but his plans didn't go as planned. He didn't even realize how bad it was until [Name] grabbed him and wrapped her magical hair around his body. And then... he was unharmed. Fellow looked down at himself, horrified. "Since when do you do THAT?" He asked. She blinked, and laughs awkwardly. "I guess... since forever?" He looked at her even more in disbelief. "And no one thought it was important to tell me?!" He was completely baffled. Healing magic like this was rare. How could a girl lost in the middle of nowhere have such an ability?

During this whole situation I can imagine several iconic scenes. Like: "Sorry, boys. I don't sing." / "I could get used to a view like this..." / "The only thing I want to do with your hair is to get out of it!… literally!" / "I know not who you are, or how I came to find you, but may I just say… hi. How ya doin'?" / "Stay calm. It can probaly smell fear."

Even, the NRC students chose not to report him. She just said, “If you get arrested, what will happen to Gidel?” and he felt his stomach turn in a strange way.

Fellow Honest had never been someone easy to impress, much less change. But something about you disconcerted him. Not only did you not treat him with disdain even after discovering his terrible intentions, you also seemed to understand something about him that even he himself did not. When he was around you, he felt as if he knew where he was going. And at last he see the light.

"Did I ever tell you, I have got a thing for your hair color?"

[lifeisstrange-incorrectquotes]

Rachel: You didn't really have a crush on me, did you?

Kate: I think I did at one point when we first met, but we became such good friends that I kind of suppressed it in favor of that relationship.

Rachel: Okay. Yeah. Yeah, me too.

Kate: What?

[candidenigma]

As usual, I think there are two different elements to this.

Firstly, that to love someone you have to know them. If you love the person you want or the person you expect or the person you think they could/would/should be then you don't love the actual person. If you love the idea of being in love or having a relationship then you don't love the actual person. If you want love, and not just infatuation, you have to make the effort to know the person as they are, and let them know you as you are. (That doesn't prohibit personal growth and development but it does mandate honesty.)

Secondly, that to love someone you have to give as well as receive. I don't believe that the desire to be "held, cooked for, taken care of" is the craving for a mother - unless we have no desire to hold, cook for, or take care of the other person. Parental love is by its nature unbalanced. Humans are born helpless and take a long time to become self-sufficient. Parental love means that the caregiver has a desire to care for the child without expecting anything in return. As the child grows up the relationship may become more balanced. If the parent needs care when elderly then the relationship may reverse entirely. But that relationship always begins from a place of helplessness on one side and responsibility on the other. Romantic relationships, like friendships, are not different because it's a different kind of love. They're different because they begin from a place of reciprocity.

NB: I realise that this is a complex issue for people with some types of disabilities, whose romantic partners may also become their carers, but this is not something I feel qualified to talk about. I have a mild disability but I'm fully capable of providing for my own basic needs.

As adults most of us don't need someone else to keep us safe and warm, or to feed us, or to help us with the daily necessities of life. We can do all that for ourselves. But we still enjoy having someone we trust do those things for us, because it's pleasurable, but also because it's such a powerful demonstration of the fact that they value us. Humans are a social species. We generally can't survive "in the wild" without others of our kind, and it's therefore a psychological imperative to know that there is someone who cares about us. To have someone give us a hug or cook us a meal or bring us a gift, whether platonically or romantically, reassures us that we're valued and won't be abandoned. On the other side of things, to provide this care indicates that we can be trusted and relied upon by that person - and being trusted is also psychologically important. The key to both friendship and romantic partnership is that it's mutual. I don't only want someone to hold me and cook for me and take care of me - I want to do all that for them. I don't only think about how my life would be different if someone (romantically) loved me - I think about how it would be if I had someone to love.

The desire to have company and someone to share our favourite TV shows, games, etc. with is also in our nature as a social species. Sharing anything - food, entertainment, or work - facilitates bonding, whether between two individuals or a group. Sharing something of importance to you is a way to create or strengthen a bond but it's also a way to determine whether the other person/s has the same value system and the same desires as far as the relationship. The more compatibility is established, the stronger the bond becomes. Problems occur when one or both are so desperate to have that bond - because they're lonely, or infatuated, or simply immature - that they overlook causes of incompatibility, or find compatibility where there is none. This comes back to the first point, that you can't love someone unless you know them.

It's an unrealistic expectation for anyone to understand us without saying a word, although it does happen for some people some of the time. It's an impossible expectation for anyone to save us. What we really want is someone who will always listen and make their best effort to understand; someone who cares enough to help us save ourselves. This is also the best that we can do for another person. The love that we desire is the same love that we had or should have had as infants. The difference is that when we've matured we desire to give as much as to receive.

[ineedpaigebuckets]

your world

an: i don't know who the fuck let me write this, or why it was even written but i hope you enjoy.

this is dedicated to my wife @ldapper of course because she thinks i don't love her like what the fuck.

also this isn't proof read AT ALL so have fun.

--------------------------------------------------------------

azzi pov

it all started the day we won gold. my best friend and i, we did it we won the championship, together. and the second the buzzer sounded and everyone started screaming i saw a certain blonde turn around and before i could wrap my arms around her she grabbed my jersey and pulled me into her chest. i hugged her with the biggest smile i think i could ever imagine.

things had been rocky recently, we'd been with eachother 24/7 for so long that we'd just developed these feelings, these confusing feeling neither of us new how to deal with. so i guess we just mutually decided, they didn't need an explanation. but right now, in this moment, her head turning and i feel her lips brush against my neck pressing a soft kiss to the skin, everything feels just right.

"so fucking proud of you az." i hear her soft voice in my ear but before i could respond she pulls away but keeps her hand across my back for a second too long.

in that moment i realized that the is wasn't some bullshit, one sided feelings. it was something about the way we just fell into each others arms, melted in each others embrace like we needed eachother. we did need eachother, in ways nobody else would ever understand.

i was still in disbelief as i walked into my room, stripping off my jersey and throwing on a sweatsuit, laying on my bed and just closing my eyes basking in the glory of winning a gold metal. a huge smile across my face.

paige pov

the second i step into my room the weight of the win hit me. i promised myself i'd get the girl, i promised myself i'd fucking make her mine before we won the title. i'd been trying to make her mine since i first watched her tournament in 2015, but she didn't want anything to do with me. the second i saw the way her messy curls bounced out of her braids, her big soft lips, and her dark sweet eyes, i knew she just had to be mine. by the time we officially met on team usa in 2017 i'd gotten far enough to make her my best friend, but no matter what i did she never seemed to understand how fucking in love with her i was. every small touch, every meaningless kiss to some random part of her skin, went completely unnoticed. i was always set on my goals, i'd do anything physically possible to make my deadlines on time. so, i knew what i had to do. i had to make that girl mine by midnight.

i'd somehow found a florist that was open at 9:30 pm and i'd never called an uber faster in my life. i'd managed to pick up a fairly small arrangement of pink flowers, her favorite color. i'd ran to the convenient store nearby, flowers in hand looking like an absolute idiot, but i was on a time crunch what could i say. i'd picked up the cutest little jellycat, a small pink heart with a lock connecting it to a purple heart. it was absolutely perfect, i'm the purple to her pink, or so i like to think. i wandered the store for a while longer finally finding what i wanted. a small olaf blanket, i just needed a little of everything for my girl.

now here i was standing like an absolute idiot outside of azzi fudds door at 10 pm. flowers in my right hand, my left holding the jellycat, and the blanket thrown over my arm.

"az open up." i mumble through the door trying not to wake anyone else on the floor up. i hear a soft groan as she opens the door causing me to chuckle. i didn't even wanna know the amount of blush covering my face right now. i watched her stand still her breathing not fast, not slow, but different.

"who's this for?" she asks in a low voice opening the door a little more to let me through. she knew damn well this was all for her.

"it's for you. i gotchu flowers because, i don't know every beautiful girl like you deserves as many flowers as she can get." i place the flowers down taking a deep breath not even close from stopping my rambling. "and, i found these hearts, purple for me pink for you. and there's a lock like, like we're locked. uh, best- we're locked." i fight the urge to say best friend, everything going downhill as i fumble over my words. and she's just fucking standing there. leaning against the dresser, her eyes big and soft looking up at me. her lips parted slightly asking me to just feel them against my own. "and here's a blanket, olaf, your favorite." i keep it short and sweet trying desperately not to mess up any more sentences.

"what's it for?" i close my eyes and set everything down against the dresser. i muster up the last bit of confidence i can, and walk up to her cupping her delicate cheeks in my hands.

"it's for you azzi. no other reason than- fuck." i couldn't get a fucking sentence out. i let my forehead rest against hers and close my eyes. "you deserve the world baby, if you just give me a chance, imma give it all to you, and more." i whisper, the feeling of having my eyes closed giving me just enough confidence to say what i finally needed to say. i push back my eyes still closed as i pressed my lips against her forehead. those big brown eyes never coming off of my face.

"holy shit, holy shit, that's what this has been this whole time?" she asks almost surprised and i feel her hands grab my shirt right by my shoulders. she shakes my shoulders but the smile on her face is irreplaceable. if only i could see that everyday.

"you're an idiot paige." she giggled and before i could even think her lips were on mine. i melt into her body, letting any ounce of confidence move right from my body into hers, as my hands grip the back of her head. her hands find my waist bringing me in closely and i think i could just die right here.

"give me your world paige, and i'll give you mine." the second the words left her mouth i knew she'd be my wife. azzi jazlyn fudd was mine, what fucking idiot would i be to ever let her go again.

[bears-sillybasement]

ohoho! soo uhmm BIG POST Y'ALL. I guess I'll pin this so everyone gets a basic idea of my oc?..I LOOOOVE explaining everything I have of him so far..SO AM AM AM AM I HOPE YOU ALL ENJOY IT??? MAYBE???

This is Bernadette!

(with and without his half-hood!)

Although Bernadette is a mostly feminine name, He chose the name himself after losing most of his childhood memories in a traumatic event.

"Bernadette" was the only word he remembered when he regained consciousness, so now he uses it for himself.

It's the only little thing from his past that he remembers with inexplicable affection.

About the hood..

This hood in the middle of his face is impossible to remove! This is because of a curse he received when putting it on.

Why? Well, it's a stolen hood. Most of the things Bernadette wears are stolen from ancient temples. All of them have an effect on him, but sadly for his desires none of them manages to actually kill him.

the facecards i made at 5am lol

It's actually weird to draw him looking straight ahead because he usually avoids looking at others, but I still made a version that way!

(I definitely didn't try very hard)

Basic (and unnecessary) information :3

Part of his design looks childish because he's a storyteller focused on children, his job is to look after and entertain most of them while their parents are busy!

Although he looks like someone chaotic or eccentric, actually has a love-hate relationship with attention. It's "fun" when others see him, but not for too long.

He likes people, as long as they don't get into his personal life. It's the same reason of why he has very, very few friends. He is very reserved with his stuff, in general. With everything.

For reasons he doesn't mention, he feels uncomfortable around small animals. He's afraid of hurting them.

he LOVES meat. except pork, he thinks it tastes like shit

Ironically, since he lives in Fontaine, he absolutely hates tea and calls it "just dirty water" (you all have the right to kill him)

but absolutely loves latte. extra sweet.

He was NOT BORN in Fontaine. His origins are something he doesn't like to talk about and barely remembers, but he lived his teenager days in the Sumeru desert

he's 20 years old now! (I should have put this sooner but I'm too lazy to fix it now lol)

Signature weapon

another stolen thing! haha, ha..never remind him of his half criminal days...

Even though its main function is as an axe, the tongue that sticks out of it is sticky..and can stretch out to help him move around, grab things (or others...)

Skills!

Right here it's my duty to thank all the mutuals who offered their OCs (blindly) for this!

I hope they like it :3

@cheeomi (thanks for ur oc!)

(Bernadette often lies to children saying that he eats the souls of those who the bear swallowed... he just likes to be dramatic.)

Something that needs to be made clear is that the bear is NOT ALIVE. It's an empty real skin coat, but a spirit lives inside.

One he knows very well..

inside the bear there's just a very strange emptiness, you're just trapped inside floating in a warm space. (so kohaku is fine, yei)

Although if you're an exorcist or someone sensitive to paranormal things, it may be a bit akward..

@scarameownya (thanks for ur oc!)

magic cape!!!!! another stolen thing!!!!

...But hey, if nobody caught you then it's yours, right?

This cape is quite peculiar, it can take you anywhere you want! real or not. although if you enter on your own it can take you to places in your mind that you don't want to see..

That's why you should not enter without permission or company!! Always ask its great, cool AND pretty owner!

Bernadette just uses it to move around places quickly. (Or hiding)

@chenyuvale (thanks for ur oc!)

Taking away the normal function of an axe, as I said, the tongue does its own thing! you can use it to move BUT it also can be used to leave people trapped.

For some reason the tongue drools..it's pretty gross when it gets stuck to the walls of the fontaine buildings!

But well um, Bernadette it's not going to clean that up.

@sylviegirly (thanks for ur oc!)

another way to get around! As you will notice, he doesn't usually walk much using his own feet..

Since what's inside the bear is a spirit, his ways of taking over the body are actually quite varied, and Bernadette uses them to his advantage...With his permission, of course!! (Just sometimes)

.

.

.

OOOFFF OKAY THAT'S ALL! for now..I hope it wasn't too much, I always wanted to do this kind of thing TvT It's not THAT bad

I'm SUPER sure I just typed something horribly wrong but...I really want to..sleep..haha..ha..

[witchthewriter]

𝐁𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐛𝐨𝐧𝐝𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐒𝐲𝐫𝐚𝐱 𝐰𝐨𝐮𝐥𝐝 𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐥𝐮𝐝𝐞

From this poll, this series is born!

a/n: this is changing the dragons from not just mount, but to being able to shift into a human-like form at will...

⤷ gender neutral, ambiguous race, and any size reader. Requests are open, thank you for reading!

𝑺𝑭𝑾🌿

・Syrax would be unwaveringly committed to you. Once the bond snaps in place, she only has eyes for you and expects the same devotion in return.

・In this relationship, you two possess the ability to communicate with each other in a way that goes beyond simple speech. Syrax can pick up on your emotions and feelings very quickly.

・All dragonshifter bonds have almost telepathic communication, but it is something both partners have to work on.

・In times of danger, Syrax would be a fierce protector, and you'd fight side by side.

・The bond would carry a lot of emotional depth, not just physical but also emotional and spiritual. You would be her confidante, her ally, and her anchor in times of uncertainty.

・Syrax's emotions run deep, and she would only ever bond with someone who can match her intensity.

・In this form, Syrax still possesses her keen senses, fiery temperament, and a deep connection to the skies and nature.

・Her human-like form has indications of her dragon self; her hair has an otherworldly shimmer, sharp fingernails, curled horns that protrude from her forehead, pointed ears and glowing eyes.

・Depending on her shift, she may retain scaled wings, allowing her to soar even in her human-like form.

・Whether she is looming over you as a dragon or standing beside you as a woman, Syrax is always your protector. If anyone so much as looks at you the wrong way, she bares her fangs in a silent warning.

・However, she does face challenges in adapting to human emotions, relationships, and societal norms.

・With her only able to dragonshift when she meets her soulmate/mate, it takes a while to understand the human way of life...

・So she asks you many, many questions about - everything.

"But I do not understand why!

"Well, I- I guess that's just the way it's been. Tradition. I think it's a tad stupid but ... that's why."

・Hence, you have to have a lot of patience with her

・Always wants to be near you; holding your hand, nuzzling into your shoulder, climbing ontop of you etc

・Likes to stare at you, you can often find her looking at you, no matter how close or far away she is.

"Oh! Sy, what are you staring at? Is there something on my face?"

"Yes," she says, leaning forward, "a kiss!"

・Bites you when she's bored...or just when you two are alone.

・Very jealous. Doesn't like it when someone looks at you too long.

・Loves sweet things; will eat an entire plate of honey lemons in 10 minutes flat

・Syrax would have such high energy; encouraging you to try new things and take risks. But reminding you that she'll always be there to catch you if you fall.

・She is so understanding. So empathetic toward you. Syrax only wants the best for you.

・There’s a strong, mutual desire to shield one another from harm.

・Nothing intimidates her. Any challenges that come up - she faces them head on. She's determined. A being who cannot be swayed.

𝑹𝒆𝒍𝒂𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏𝒔𝒉𝒊𝒑 𝑻𝒓𝒐𝒑𝒆𝒔

"You wear the pants in this relationship" (Syrax) x "oh I wish, I cannot control you at all" (You)

Wear Matching Necklaces

Primal & Possessive

𝑹𝒐𝒎𝒂𝒏𝒕𝒊𝒄 𝑷𝒍𝒐𝒕 𝑻𝒓𝒐𝒑𝒆

Unbreakable Bond/Bonded for Life

Mutual Growth

The Dragon’s Protector

𝑻𝒉𝒆𝒎𝒆 𝑺𝒐𝒏𝒈

The Sails of Charon by Scorpions

Say Yes To Heaven by Lana Del Rey

The Wolf by Fever Ray

𝑁𝑆𝐹𝑊 🔞 No one under the age of 18 past this point, makes me feel weird if you read it.

・First of all, Syrax is incredibly possessive of you. She has a primal instinct to make everyone know that you are hers and she is yours.

・She is incredibly strong, even if she doesn't look it...and gods does she love using her strength against you

・Her favourite thing to do is hold you against a wall, or! pin you on the bed.

・Her teeth raking down your cheek, neck, chest and stomach...

・Syrax loves to mark you. Bites, bruises, deep scratches. She expects to see them the next day. If she notices them fading too quickly...she’ll remedy that immediately.

・Needs to have her scent on you. Many know you are together, but with her scent Syrax is letting every other magical being that you are bonded

・When her instincts are particularly strong, she burns for you - literally. Her body runs hotter than a human's and when she's aroused, her body is warm to the touch.

・She does have a Heat.

・And it can last for upto a week. During that time, no matter what has to be done, Syrax is not letting you leave her side. She needs to be near you at all times.

・During this time, she is constantly wet, constantly needing you.

・She ruts against you, sometimes slowly, just to relieve some part of her. Other times, she pins you down and humps you until she's reached her peak.

・If it was any other time, she would want to be the dominant one. But during her Heat, she wants to be used; wants her hair pulled, her nipples swollen from constant biting and pulling.

・Even when she cums, she makes different noises. She sounds more needy - whining and crying out.

[babyjinsu]

[r/situationships] i don't know where i stand with this girl.

PAIRING ⟢ sohee lee x fem!reader

GENRE ⟢ reddit au, social media au, friends(?) to lovers, fluff, crack, written

SYNOPSIS ⟢ a confused boy wants to know if it is still 'just friends' if you do non-friends things with a supposedly "only friend" on r/situationships.

FEATURING ⟢ wonbin, seunghan, & anton of riize and yuna of itzy

CHAPTERS ⟢002 003

💭 one of my favourite trope :( clueless boy.. i can't think of any other member besides sohee for this!! my ddori.. <3 pls enjoy n lmk ur thoughts! xoxo

[r/situationships] i don't know where i stand with this girl. posted by u/ddori • 7h ago

hey everyone. this will sound kinda embarrassing but i (21M), hv been talking to this girl (21F) from my finance class for a while now (like 4 months..?), and honestly, i hv nooo idea what we are. i know for sure we're definitely more than friends, at least to me, thats how it feels like.

we met through a mutual friend, and from there we kinda just go with the flow. we hold hands sometimes, she lets me stay over her place (just sleeping, nothing else, but on the same bed or couch), and she invites me to go places with her-- sometimes doing nothing at all, we just spend a lot of time together. ive nvr had this kind of closeness with someone of the opposite gender and still are just friends... we've nvr had a real convo abt what we're doing (to each other).

as far as i know, and from her friends, shes not seeing anyone else, or treats anyone the way she does to me. and im definitely not seeing anyone either. (i want her so bad)

its messing with my head because i really really like this girl. i want to believe that she likes me too, with how shes treating me but i dont know if she just sees me as a really close friend, or if shes waiting for me to make a move. i dont think shes playing with my feelings or whatnot. hopefully.

ive heard plenty of things about this phenomenon called "situationship" and by the looks (and sound) of it, ITS HORRIBLE. this girl is really nice and the people she surround herself with are really amazing, and ik that they always call their friends out on mistakes. so i'm pretty sure she's not that type of girl.

but still, is this what they call a situationship? is this how it feels like to be in one? is it called so because youre in a situation?? i feel so stuck and i dont know where i stand in her life. what do i do?

Top Comments:

[u/financiallybroke] bro if you're confused, you're in a situationship. it's plain and simple. sounds like she enjoys your company with how she includes you in her daily life but without a real conversation, you're just guessing where you stand in each others' lives.

[u/ddori OP replying to u/financiallybroke] damn,, i don't like the whole idea or concept of situationship :/ it's ridiculous n just cruel tbh?

[u/illfated] there are two takes on this. either youre in a situationship, or shes waiting for you to bring it up. if she wanted you to be her boyfriend, she would either say it or drop hints. itll be better for you to ask IMO. stop wasting time op!

[u/mahjongpro99] been there n got my heart broken. learned it the hard way that if they wanted to make it official, you'll know. moreover, you guys have mutual friends, they'd AT LEAST know if she's into you.

[u/ddori OP replying to u/mahjongpro99] hhh one time they teased and asked if we we're dating, and neither she or i denied. we just laughed along, and she even joked and asked if i want to-- to which i just replied with another laugh because surely shes just joking?

[u/honeymaiden] i was in her shoes and i kept waiting and waiting, and hoping he'd say something or even asked about us. i wanted the guy to confess first, actually telling me that he likes me instead of flirting like we were doing, but he never did so we stayed in limbo until things died down. don't let that happen to either of you, just be honest op. she might like u too, and if not, at least yk better.

[u/L_user] my 'ex' treated me exactly like this. we even did IT, celebrated valentines and dinner dates, did everything like couples did, but when i finally brought it up, she hit me with "oh, i thought we're just really close friends!" like the fuck lmfao. if you dont want to end up feeling like a clown, or embarrass yourself any further, ask her before you get even more attached.

[u/cgpa40 replying to u/L_user] second this. don't invest too much time and effort without knowing ur returns. u deserve clarity op.

[u/ddori OP replying to u/cgpa40] thanks guys. ill try bringing it up when i see her. sorry that happened to u though!

[u/tapiocapearl] hi OP. i'm a girl and this sounds like something girls do when they have a crush on someone, but is too scared to make the first actual move (besides including you in her activities). sometimes we need reassurance, like a proper green light that you like LIKE us.

[u/ddori OP replying to u/tapiocapearl] thanks! feels nice to read another comment from another girl. will be meeting her soon so ill try asking.

[u/tapiocapearl replying to u/ddori OP] yeah! show her you want her seriously as a romantic partner, relationship wise and she'll probably meet you halfway. best of luck, lmk if i got it right or not!

💭 just realised (as i was doing the final proofread) that the comments section is longer than the story itself smiley faceee...

[tubbytarchia]

Really ill and deranged thoughts about Jimmy's Impossible Minecraft SMP Finale (regarding Grian and Joel):

Grian is SO nice to Jimmy that I'd go as far as to call it uncharacteristic. Not that he's never been like this but most times he's around Jimmy, he always makes some quips or causes him harm in some way. Yet not once within Jimmy's video does he do so (aside from when Joel started killing Jimmy and Grian joined in) even whilst spending half of it alone with him. While he doesn't view Jimmy as an object of desire like most other contributors, he still enforces the ecosystem to the point of taking Jimmy out by his own hand in Wild Life. This makes a lot of sense with the context of KOV to me, where he suffered as the runt of the group but he won't have to again as long as Jimmy retains that position instead. I don't doubt that he cares about Jimmy to some degree, but retaining that system seems ultimately more important to him when it becomes challenged. He looks out for himself first 9 out of 10 times

Here, he looks out for and encourages Jimmy. What hit me especially hard was the part during their last venture altogether, where everyone is preparing to go fight the dragon, but only Jimmy and Grian have an Elytra, so they fly off far ahead of the rest. Jimmy says he feels bad and Grian's immediate response is to deny it. There is something abundantly sweet about them flying together and teasing the rest of the group together, especially considering the avian headcanons often applied to them. And then them both also taking on an important task within the End fight as a result. Jimmy being trusted to to something important yknow. And no one commenting on that fact either, they just let him. hhh. Something to also say about it turning entirely self sacrificial since they decided that them blowing themselves up was the best way to get rid of the healing crystals. Hrrm. This battle btw is just kind of unironically awesome with Jimmy and Grian flying around whilst the others are taking shots from the ground

And Joel... grits my teeth

Joel and Jimmy just duking it out. Just beating the shit out of each other with no rhyme or reason. Is really therapeutic and I feel like they both really needed to get that out of their system. The way Joel kills him once and continues to go at him again after the respawn, which seems unfair but it feels mutual and Jimmy fucking honed in. And you guys have got to know by now how good he is when he hones in. You can feel the concentration as he takes one after another shot at Joel at impressive distance. Legitimately could not stop thinking about his MCC 3v1 Dodgebolt clutch man

It's such sudden tension as they focus in on each other and ignore whatever the hell they were supposed to be doing with the others in the first place, but it's so warranted considering their characters and their relationship. It happening in a much more light-hearted series with lower stakes is also perfect, especially with keep-inventory now enabled. They get to fight until they're content without any consequences, much different from the Life series where Joel's feelings surface (to his detriment) the most

Jimmy commenting "That's the first time I've killed Joel" makes me all at once sad, happy and confused. He already had a notable kill on Joel, whether or not Lizzie assisted him with it. I'd believed that the reason he was so deadset on killing Joel in Wild Life was to prove himself to him, or to himself, or both. Because Joel is important to him and he thinks highly of him. To kill Joel would be proving something, I think. And/or earning respect from the person whose opinions he values most. I can't fathom what other reason he could have possibly had. And then when he does get that kill, Jimmy immediately drops the act and they make up and become allies (as if they weren't already)

For Jimmy to call this his first kill instead means he doesn't recognize the WL one despite the importance he placed on it. It perplexes me greatly and I think this needs more analysis lol. That's why it also makes me sad because it's not at all uncommon for Jimmy to play himself down and dismiss his successes, but I'm also happy that he was feeling genuinely good about himself in that moment

And of course Lizzie contributing lol. Just as she did in Wild Life. And then Jimmy accidentally shooting her head on before honing back in on Joel

And then Jimmy kills him again at the very end after Joel started blasting everyone with his newly acquired dragon head weapon?? Nice. Healthy for them. Jimmy's needed to start killing people for awhile and I'm glad if he can get his fix via Joel. Joel deserves it anyway. It's no solution but it is something they needed I think

Edit: Need to note how easily flustered Joel becomes after becoming the target instead of Jimmy. Getting a taste of his own medicine. It is kind of distressing to watch because of reasons (Limited Life flashbacks) but within this context where he did ultimately and undeniably start it, it's much more warranted

There's also something symbolic to me about Joel trying to hit Jimmy again but failing before Jimmy takes off flying but also I'm crazy

[lucktv]

OMS HIII!!!! Thank you @star-lights-up For tagging me!! I had honestly seen this before and thought "Oms Id love to participate in this" AND HERE I AM. I will mention that Im very new to tumblr so Im sorry if I'm doing stuff wrong and please tell cuz I will never learn if I never know (;

Now Get to know your mutuals!!

What's the origin of your blog title? Well... Long story but basically my real name is pronounced differently than whats written down (Because native language just pronounce the letters differently) And so I was quickly like; 'hmmm I need to find something thats still pretty close to my own name, but also everyone knows how to pronounce' And quickly I came up with the name 'Luka' Which is only once letter removed from my own. And then I just kinda wanted to have a cool username for it, so I had thought of many different things until I came up with "Luckalot" And that just kinda stuck. However, people I met online started calling me "Luck" Because of it, and honestly I have grown very fond of that name!!! SO anyways I might change my name to 'luckalot' on here because its 'lucktv' rn cuz I just kinda quickly made this account not knowing I'd be X-Men obsessed 2 months later. But its lucktv becuase (Taylor's Version) for those wondering!! :D

OTP(s) + Shipname: Honestlyyyy I dont really get obsessed over more ships than one at the same time soooo right now it's really just Charles/Erik - Cherik :3

But I also have been obessed with Sylvie/Loki - Sylki for a while (Some people get so mad about that But I just love em)

But that's about it when it comes to marvel, there's not many marvel ships I have actually been obsessed with for some reason...

Big Remus Lupin/Sirius Black - Wolfstar Shipper too tho!! My marauders phase was long ago but Id love to go back to it any moment :D

Favourite colour: Yellowww!!! Mostly just like the yellow yellow yk, like the chrome logo yellow, basically the yellow used whenever yellow needs to be used :3

Favourite game: I play lots of Minecraft!!! aaannnd Im one of those roblox players :3 I play little word games to improve my english on there and also Royale High because I LOVE Fashion and I played DTI for a bit but after all the updates I kinda stopped idk

Song stuck in your head:

The entire soundtrack of Wicked

Weirdest habit/trait? Good question! I do a lot of weird stuff that Im just kinda not aware of actually. But one I can think of right now is that I always lipsync to my music and its not only my lips but Im very expressive with my eyebrows so I kinda weirdly move my eyebrows with my singing... and yes this happens in public too, I can't help it (,:

Hobbies: Drawing, quite literally any type of art; writing, painting, graphic design, fashion and the list goes on

Im also OBSESSED with reading, but most specifically Fanfics and RN Cherik fanfics (Like literally I just finished a 180k fanfic in 2 weeks AND IM DYSLEXIC) I sometimes get a little too obsessed and just sit in my room ALL DAY reading fanfics in the weekend (If I even have time) And Im a big music listener! Music is very important to me and I love to listen to my playlists every moment of the day C:

If you work, what's your profession? Im a full time Media Design Student :3 But I have done a painters study for one year so I do lots of little painting side quests for family and friends (And they pay me (sometimes))

If you could have any job you wish, what would it be? Realistically? I would LOVE to be just an overall illustrator, for like Book covers but also comics and storyboards, I would love to do something like that and just switch it up from time to time!

Something you're good at: Painting and drawing!! I enjoy it A LOT and I think I'm pretty good at it!! I'm also getting into shirt designs and so far I am quite proud of my creations :D

Something you're bad at: staying calm, I stress about quite literally EVERYTHING, Im a very anxious person from nature and am almost chronically stressed (,: I also have social anxiety which is big reason for my awkwardness most of the time... Idk Im just low-key a loser but Im a somewhat happy loser :p

Something you love:

X-MENNNNN< Specifically CHERIKKK!!!

And also very much Taylor Swift!! Her music is everything to me and Im a Proud swiftie

Something you could talk about for hours off the cuff: ANY and I say ANY of my hyperfixations; Cherik, Taylor swift, Arcane And also about deep life stuff, idk if it's with the right person I could talk HOURS about life and everything around it C:

Something you hate: People who hate and judge others for being excited about things they like???? Like huh??

Something you collect: rocks, rings, necklaces, earrings, more rocks, shells, literal trash, stickers, erasers??, just lots of useless stuff really...

Something you forget: everything... no but like; art ideas, writing ideas, where I left my shoes, where I left my phone (Its in my hand), what class I have first, What my teacher is called, when I promised my friend to hang out, texting people back, homework.... Everything BUT that one time I accidentally said "you too" To a person working at a cinema telling me "Enjoy the movie"

What's your love language? Quality Time and Physical touch both recieving and giving :D People always associate physical touch with weird stuff for some reason?? but I just REALLY like hugs and shoulder pats and pokes and tickles and elbow bumps and high fives and CUDDLLESSS :D

Favourite movie/show: X-Men First Class, Beauty and the Beast, Miss Americana, Arcane and The Amazing Spider-Man

Favourite food: I really enjoy Watermelon and tuna! But I like lots of foods!!

Favourite animal: Tigers, theyre absolutely adorable cute little big cats and they have STRIPES!

What were you like as a child? Overall very energetic (With my friend and family)! I was very shy and anxious as a child too, thats kinda always been like that XD I was also very good at being very very dramatic :3

Favourite subject at school? I have this little extra class I chose to do because I like painting so much, and it's basically just 2 hours of painting :D So that's deff my favourite

Least favourite subject: Maths.

What's your best character trait? I am very empathetic! I often understand others better than I understand myself

What's your worst character trait? Im a 24/7 stressed overthinker :p

If you could change any detail of your life right now, what would it be? anything that would gain me more time for the stuff I actually like doing, making cherik art, writing cherik fanfics... you know it

If you could travel in time, who would you like to meet? Idk if this is weird but Im just gonna pull a Charles Xavier and I'd say my past self? I just have so much I wish I could say to her <:

Tagging some of my mutuals! You don't have to respond if you dont want to :D (Or if u already did) @swiftie-as-a-coursing-river @faerlycertain @veevil @vvividlyy

Get to know your mutuals! Thank you to @joyful-soul-collector for tagging.

What's the origin of your blog title? I have a bunch of sideblogs dedicated to my most active fandoms and I am an insomniac. My first ever fandom sideblog started the trend as a joke and I just carried on the tradition!

OTP(s) + Shipname: Jayce and Viktor is the main one right now. I also love Ed and Stede from Our Flag Means Death.

Favourite colour: Iridescent white

Favourite game: Dungeons and Dragons for sure! I also like playing Jackbox games with friends.

Song stuck in your head: To Be Seen - Searows

Weirdest habit/trait? Sitting and doing things in the dark. I just prefer existing in dim light because lights can be overwhelming and the darkness keeps my mind calm. Doesn't help I'm stuck in fluorescent lighting all day haha!

Hobbies: Writing, Singing, Crafting, and Baking

If you work, what's your profession? I'm a medical laboratory technician in blood sciences!

If you could have any job you wish, what would it be? Realistically? Since it specifies realistic, I'd like to be a biomedical scientist in immunology. It would mean getting another degree but I don't mind that too much.

Something you're good at: I'm good at writing! I recently wrote my first children's book and intend to write more when the inspiration comes back. A poetic style of writing is my favourite to do.

Something you're bad at: Socialising. I'm quite awkward but I still like chatting to people.

Something you love: Snails! I adore snails, I used to have pet giant African land snails for a few years.

Something you could talk about for hours off the cuff: The immune system, pathogenic disease, my fifty million apocalypse stories, etc.

Something you hate: Willful ignorance and anti vaxxers. Both suck very much.

Something you collect: Pins! I have so many. They're on my lanyard, my dunagrees, my pinboard, and my ita bag.

Something you forget: The thing I was meant to be doing.

What's your love language? Gift giving and quality time. Also words of affirmation.

Favourite movie/show: Arcane for sure at the moment. I also love The Walking Dead, Good Omens, Our Flag Means Death, and a bunch of apocalypse/zombie shows.

Favourite food: Pizza

Favourite animal: Snails! 🐌

What were you like as a child? Strange is the best way to describe it honestly.

Favourite subject at school? Science! All the science.

Least favourite subject: Religious Education. No thanks.

What's your best character trait? I'm very passionate about the things and people I love.

What's your worst character trait? I tend to keep things bottled up inside until they come out all at once, I'm still working on not doing that.

If you could change any detail of your life right now, what would it be? Being able to sleep as soon as my head hits the pillow! That would be amazing.

If you could travel in time, who would you like to meet? I'm not sure, I'm not particularly enamoured by anyone in the past. Maybe Oscar Wilde.

Tagging anyone who wants to!

[izzy-b-hands]

I keep forgetting I can't seem to get the current version of xkit to work on my new laptop and going to do stuff that it let me do fjldksafjdlsaj

[esmesketch]

HONK if you're still deep inside the Far Cry 5 hole trap in 2024 and can't escape.

[anannoyanceofjackofsmiles]

"Historically, the [bloody mary] divination ritual would encouraged young women holding a candle and a hand mirror in a dark room. As they gazed into the mirror, they would supposedly catch a glimpse of their future husband. But, there was a chance instead they'd see a skull or ghastly visage, signifying they were going to die before marrying." -Bloody Mary Folklore

So, during a VC one day me and @thevioletscout were talking and joked that Poor Edward would function Very nicely as a type of Urban Legend, Bloody Mary-esque character. I mean look at his name.

And during that same call (or around that time frame), roughly at the same time we had the idea of what fankids of Poor Edward would look like from our respective PCs. So. Here's Helen Wolff! And why, you may ask, is she doing a divination ritual...?

Well.

Girl is getting hassled by suitors at 15-16 and is probably the Most aro-ace person in the entire Neath. So I joked for a long time she'd overheard rumors of a divination ritual to see her fate in marriage, and Celebrates when she thinks she sees a representation of death. Truly, the only time someone would actually be Happy seeing Poor Edward.

And no, she never learned about her mirror dad. Sawyer Wolff kind of ensured she'd never learn about him. But you can't avoid every mirror in London, now can you?

[fitpacs]

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